Welcome to my house! Check out the decor, arranged with perfect feng shui, of course. Oh no, please don’t sit on the paper towel tube, that is my midnight snack you see. I must keep my pearly whites nice and healthy and that does the trick! Perhaps you’d like to run through the tubes? No? Too big you say? Well, perhaps you brought me some apple slices as a housewarming gift we can devour together? Yes? You did! Well you can be my new BFF!

Squeak, squeak! Why hello! I forgot you might not speak Guinea Pig, forgive me. Is that a carrot in your shirt pocket? No? Oh. Just a pen you say. Why don’t you keep carrots in there? Too messy? Oh. Perhaps you have a carrot tucked away somewhere else? No? Oh. Hmm. Well, it’s still nice to meet you. What’s that? You have lettuce! Why that is just as good as a carrot! So kind, so kind of you to share with me! Mmmm, Squeak! Squeak! Oh, yes, that means thank you!

Why begging has benefits, look at my cute little black button eyes, how can you resist them? There are so many tasty treats you keep in the icebox, just waiting for me to give them my tastebud seal of approval! Why even with the door shut I can smell the deliciousness that is timothy grass, and carrots! Oh my, is that a hint of cucumber I smell? Of course I am begging, and you are powerless to resist me!